A Wise Son or a Scoffer

The contrast in this verse, indicated by the word “but”, is that of “a wise son” and “a scoffer”, a scoffing son. It can be understood as an introductory verse. We see this contrast reflected and applied in numerous everyday situations in the following verses.

A wise son will accept or embrace “his father’s discipline”. He listens to fatherly discipline, he keeps and values it, he respects it and acts accordingly. “[Accept his]” is not in the text, which is indicated by the square brackets. It can be inferred from the second line of verse that listening is meant. But it could also mean embrace or accept or respect or some other positive valuation. The phrase can even be rendered this way: “A wise son [is the fruit of] his father’s instruction” (Darby Translation in a footnote). Seen this way, he owes his wisdom to his good upbringing. Because he is wise, he has listened, and because he has listened, he is now wise.

The scoffer laughs at his father when the latter rebukes him. “Rebuke” is a stronger word than discipline. No matter how forcefully the father addresses the son, if the son is a scoffer, he does not listen. He shuts himself off from it; he does not want to learn from it. In doing so, he moves outside the sphere of fatherly love that is necessary for his spiritual and emotional development. He who does not listen to parental rebuke does not listen to God’s rebuke either. Both are meant for the son to go the way of blessing and to be a blessing.

A scoffer is at the highest level of foolishness. He has no respect for authority, he blasphemes religion, and, thinking he knows what is best, he rejects any teaching. The change to the stronger word “rebuke” in the second line of verse shows that he does not respond to any discipline.

He who possesses true wisdom acknowledges that someone more experienced can keep him from stumbling along the way he is going. It is a new, unfamiliar way for him, but not for the experienced father. He who is not wise and does not listen, who is a scoffer and despises discipline from an “experiencer”, will learn by bitter experience what would have been spared him had he listened.

The Fruit and Protection of the Mouth

By “the fruit of [his] mouth” (Pro 13:2) is meant the speaking of the righteous. Fruit here is the result of inner considerations, of deliberations in the heart. We can only have good fruit come from our mouth if there are good considerations in our heart (Lk 6:45). The desire that animates the heart of the treacherous is nothing but violence. There is a different source. “Good” and “violence” prove what is in the heart. The good is pleasant in taste and smell; violence is hurtful, harsh and hard.

The Christian who walks in fellowship with God will communicate God-fearing language with his mouth. However others may react to it, it will at least do his own soul good, invigorating and edifying it. For himself, the words he speaks are good food. The same is true for those to whom he speaks. They are refreshed by his words. The result in turn is that he receives blessing from those whom he has refreshed through his words.

The treacherous are the faithless, the untrustworthy. Their desire, their ‘appetite’, is not to give others something good to eat, but to commit violence. Their aim is not to help others, but to harm them through violence. This can be physical violence, but they can also use verbal violence and speak hurtful words. Hurtful chants at soccer games are an example of this.

Pro 13:3 connects to Pro 13:2. The lips are fed by what comes from the heart, says Pro 13:2. At the same time, the mouth must be guarded (Pro 13:3), for not everything that is good should always be said. It is also to be guarded against something bad coming out of the mouth after all. Even in the believer, sin still dwells. The mouth is represented here as a city or a house that must be guarded. We can also make the application to the use of ‘modern mouths’ like Facebook and twitter, which are quite often used to hurt. What misery this has already caused. Just think of the bullying via ‘social’ media among high school students.

To guard one’s mouth means to heed what comes out of one’s mouth, what one says, the words one speaks (cf. Psa 141:3). It is safest to keep one’s mouth shut. The lesson is that tight control over what one says prevents problems. The advice to ‘sleep on’ something before responding is valuable.

An old Arabic proverb says: Be careful not to cut your throat with your tongue. That does apply to “one who opens wide his lips”, that is, always blurting out everything at once. It refers to someone who without any self-control and without any thought always thinks he has to have his say. The contrast in the previous verse is the fruitful tongue versus the false tongue. Here the “unrestrained tongue” is contrasted with the “bridled tongue”. He who is careful with his tongue takes a safe route to preserve his life. His life is often endangered by speaking much and rashly, by blurting everything out. He who cannot restrain his tongue faces his ruin.

The Desire of the Sluggard Against Diligence

The sluggard desires prosperity and abundance and dreams of it. But his craving remains unfulfilled, empty, vain, because its fulfillment requires effort, which he does not wish to make. Diligent people respond to God’s purpose for their life and will experience its fulfillment. They seek first the kingdom of God and receive the other with it (Mt 6:33). The diligent do not lie around all day dreaming of all the things they would like to have, but work for the fulfillment of their dreams.

The diligent is made fat with what the sluggard desires in vain. The sluggard has the desire, but not the will. He desires the yield of diligence, without the diligence that yields something. He is envious of what others know and have, but he wants to be wise without (Bible) study and to be (spiritually) rich without making an effort. It is about craving without effort to get the coveted thing. He wants to be a Christian, but without the effort involved. The road to hell is paved with such desires.

Righteous or Wicked

Pro 13:5 is about the mind and actions of the righteous and the wicked. Pro 13:6 is about the results, the guarding righteousness and the subverting wickedness.

It does not say in Pro 13:5 that the righteous never lies. Nor is it about avoiding falsehood. Avoiding falsehood can also be done out of selfish motives, without hating falsehood. It is about hating it, abhorring it (Rom 12:9). This hatred is present in the righteous because he possesses the Divine nature.

Falsehood is expressed in speaking a false word. Every word spoken in falsehood is hateful to God and to the righteous. We cannot love the truth without hating falsehood. This is perfectly true with the Lord Jesus and will be so with everyone who lives close to Him.

The wicked lives in falsehood and acts disgustingly and shamefully. What he says and does stinks and is shameful. Putting someone in a bad light is done by speaking lying words about him. But because of this, he who does this comes into an evil smell himself. It is an odor that hangs around him. He who uses falsehood acts shamefully. The wicked makes himself hated and behaves shamefully by his falsehood.

“Righteousness” and “wickedness” are personified in Pro 13:6. The righteous is characterized by righteousness. Such a person is “one whose way is blameless”, that is, pure motives determine his actions and walk. His righteousness protects him from evil attacks to make him sin. He is guarded by his righteousness from acting insincerely or deceitfully because he is clothed with “the breastplate of righteousness” (Eph 6:14). Righteousness is like a breastplate of armor that protects the heart from which flow “the springs of life” (Pro 4:23).

Opposed to righteousness is wickedness. This is what characterizes the sinner. He is without any protection from sin and goes a way of sin. Wickedness lacks any thought of God. He who is wicked does nothing but sin. The sinner’s way inevitably ends in subversion or destruction. He is plunged into it without anything or anyone preventing it. It is presented here as something he himself works.

The Rich Poor Man and the Poor Rich Man

People can pretend to be different than they are (Pro 13:7). That is hypocrisy or stage acting, living behind a mask. It is being someone you are not in reality. The instruction in this is to be honest, without posturing. This is possible only if both the rich and the poor see themselves in God’s light. James points out to both the poor and the rich what attitude each should have before God (Jam 1:9-10). Paul did not want anyone to think more highly of him than what was seen or heard of him (2Cor 12:6b).

Here it is about people pretending to be rich while they are poor and people pretending to be poor while they are rich. Pretending to be rich can be done to avoid losing face. For example, a person who has lost everything may want to hold up the status of wealth and, therefore, prestige among people, his neighbors or colleagues. He who pretends anything is living in falsehood.

He who “pretends to be poor, but has great wealth” may do so out of fear of being killed for stealing their wealth. It may also be out of fear of having to give something away, having to perform an act of mercy. He who pretends to be poor for this reason does so to evade his obligation to be good to the poor and open his hand wide to them (Deu 15:11). The motive then is avarice.

What applies to wealth can also be applied to power and prestige and also to spiritual gifts. The church at Laodicea pretended to be spiritually rich, but it possessed nothing (Rev 3:17; cf. Hos 12:9). Christ, Who stood outside, confronted them with this. You can also say that you are nothing and can do nothing, although you are rich in Christ, but have no desire to take responsibility. People who say something of themselves should not be believed without question. In phrases like ‘I am very good at this’, or ‘I really can’t do that’, it is about one’s own ‘self’. In both cases, the Lord as the Giver is denied.

Paul was poor but made many rich (2Cor 6:10) both by preaching the gospel to unbelievers and by teaching the church (cf. Acts 3:6). Above all, the Lord Jesus, Who was rich and became poor for our sake, made us rich through His poverty (2Cor 8:9).

Pro 13:8 connects to Pro 13:7. There are disadvantages to having wealth. A person who is rich can become the prey of a kidnapper. Then he must give all his wealth as a ransom to stay alive. A poor person does not face such danger. He is not even threatened, because there is nothing to be taken from him. He cannot be blackmailed and in this respect he lives without worry.

We see here that wealth creates difficulties for the rich, while a poor person does not suffer from them. Poverty has this advantage over wealth. The poor person can go to sleep peacefully, so to speak, without locking the door, because he has nothing that a burglar could be after.

A Rejoicing Light or a Lamp That Goes Out

The life of “righteous” radiate “light”. This “rejoices” them and also those around them. The good things in their life benefit others and give joy. What benefits the wicked have do not result in lasting joy, for in those benefits there is nothing of God, Who is light (cf. Job 18:5-6; Job 21:17). They have no light from God, the only Source of light. Therefore, their lamp, a symbol of the light of life, is extinguished (Pro 20:20; 27; Pro 24:20).

Light and joy belong together (Est 8:16). The light of the righteous is the Word of God (Psa 119:105), which is a source of joy (Psa 119:24; 77; 92; 143; 174).

Light is an independent source of light, whereas a lamp derives light from something. The lamp can also be a picture of the Word of God (Psa 119:105), but here it is not. The lamp is artificial light, like the light of a candlestick in the past, or in our time also electric light. It represents the artificial light of man’s darkened mind without God. He who walks in that light, and the wicked do, ends up in complete darkness (cf. Mt 6:22-23).

Insolence or to Receive Counsel

Insolence – he arrogance of ‘I know everything’ – proves itself in glorying in one’s own wisdom and contemptuously rejecting advice. The result is strife. By the way, in a strife two carnal natures are involved. He who accepts counsel acknowledges the need for counsel and accepts those who give it to him. He shows wisdom, resulting in harmony rather than strife.

Strife is avoided by seeking good, Scriptural counsel from others who are spiritual, not from unspiritual people. It is especially important to seek counsel from God. The truly teachable is he who acknowledges that what he does not know is infinitely more than what he does know.

Strife, discord, arises from elevating oneself above others and not wanting to know about correction. That happened in Corinth. Paul came with counsel to correct that.

Easy Come, Easy Go

This verse is about here and now, about immediate owning and enjoying. It is a warning against wild speculation. It is the spirit of our time. Everything must be immediately available for enjoyment. Quick money, quick enjoyment. Therefore, many people participate in lotteries or speculations. If you win prizes, you can become wealthy overnight. It can also be about possession by theft. The happiness of that ebbs away in time. There is no lasting pleasure in earthly things. Here the proverb ‘easy come, easy go’ applies, meaning that what you have easily gained, you can easily lose again. A person who lives from ‘easy’ money is also not careful with it.

The patient worker who “gathers by labor” works for the future. His possession does not diminish, but increases. His satisfaction does not diminish, but increases. This is also and especially true spiritually.

God does not use lottery or gambling or theft to make someone rich. He wants us to work hard and honestly for our possessions. Ways that God can use to make someone rich without working for it are an inheritance and a donation.

Hope Deferred or Desire Fulfilled

What the “hope deferred” is not mentioned here. It is general. The idea is that the time during which one must cherish his hope is lengthening, that the fulfillment is being repeatedly postponed. One thinks that now fulfillment is almost coming, but it turns out not to be so. Each time there is disappointment or even disillusionment. Such hope makes the heart sick. One becomes despondent and languishes under it.

A “desire fulfilled” is something different from a particular hope with which a person is repeatedly deceived. Fulfilled desire speaks of a longing for something God has promised and which He also fulfills. Such a fulfilled desire “is a tree of life”. As a result, the heart is not made sick, but filled with fellowship with God which is eternal and fully satisfying.

The deepest desire of the righteous is the desire for the coming of Christ. When He comes, that desire is fulfilled. Simeon experienced His coming (Lk 2:25-30; Hag 2:7). All believers will experience His coming. They persistently look forward to it. Therefore, a deferred desire is quite different from expecting something with perseverance.

The disciples had a hurt or pained heart because their hope for the reign of the Messiah was postponed. The two disciples going to Emmaus had a hurt or sorrowful heart because of a disappointed hope. We are disappointed in our hope when we base our hope on our own desires and not on what God’s Word says.

Despise or Fear

The first line of verse is a warning against despising “the word”, which is the Word of God. Whoever despises the Word of God will not stand, but “will be in debt to it” (Heb 10:26-31). His whole house of life will be destroyed. King Saul is an example of this (1Sam 15:17-23). The second line of verse is a motivation to fear the Word as “the commandment”. Those who are obedient to the Word will be rewarded by God for it.

The opposites are “despise” and “fear”, and “be in debt to it” and “be rewarded”. They are about “the word” and “the commandment”, which is the Word of God and the commandment of God, and obedience to it or rejecting it. “The word” refers to teaching in general, while “the commandment” implies a command and points to powerful instruction.

Wisdom or Folly

From “the teaching of the wise” comes life for all who listen to it (Pro 13:14). This teaching “is a fountain of life” that quenches the thirst of the righteous for fellowship with God. Fellowship with God is true life. That is what all the teaching of the wise is directed to.

However, there are forces at work that seek to kill the righteous. Death is everything that is not in fellowship with God. The second line of verse gives the motive for the first line of verse. The teaching of the wise not only gives life, but also ensures that as long as we make our way on earth, we will “turn aside from the snares of death” and remain in fellowship with God. “The snares of death” suggests that death is a hunter or fowler lurking on its prey.

The world through which we must pass is described as a place teeming with snares of death. A snare is stretched to catch and kill. The means of getting someone into the snare is bait. Bait looks like something edible and tasty, but in reality it is a means of killing. The Word of God reveals the true nature of bait and serves as a guide to avoid snares and traps. Then we stay alive. Judas, the betrayer of the Lord Jesus, did not accept the teaching and fell into the snares of death.

As we go through the minefields of life on earth, the Word of God shows us how to avoid stepping on a landmine and being blown up. It gives us the hope of escape and a safe arrival.

“Good understanding” (Pro 13:15) is not only understanding the teaching of Pro 13:14, but also applying it. That gives or works favor with God and people (Lk 2:52). Good understanding works good dealings with one’s fellow man, one’s neighbor, thereby gaining his favor. It is about the mind enlightened by the Spirit by which a person knows and does the will of God and he goes the way of wisdom. Those who follow God’s teachings experience the favor of men.

In contrast, “the way of the treacherous is hard”. It is not a difficult way, but an impassable way. The treacherous go that way and perish. They lack good sense and cannot be trusted. They dream of a way that goes over roses, but their way is paved with thorns. They are hard people you cannot trust and live with. They do not think life is hard, but they make it hard for others.

By “the way” are meant the doings and dealings. The idea is that while good understanding produces favor, the conduct of the treacherous does not produce any lasting results.

“Every prudent man” will study the facts and then decide (Pro 13:16). “Every” means “all”, without exception. He who is prudent will not take his feelings as the basis of action. He knows the dangers and pitfalls of circumstances. This makes him cautious. The fool proceeds very differently. He follows his hunches. The fool is reminiscent of a peddler displaying his wares. Just as a peddler displays his goods to recommend them, so the fool does with his follies.

Here we see the contrast between the thoughtfulness that characterizes the prudent and the fool’s recklessness who blurts out foolishness. The fool displays foolishness. He spreads it like a peacock does with its feathers.

“Knowledge” is more than just having information in one’s head. It is proficiency in the use of knowledge; it is understanding the art of applying acquired knowledge. In the context of the verse, it means that the prudent one knows how to hide something and succeeds in doing so, while the fool lacks this ability and spreads around him what is foolishness. Every prudent person first assures himself that he knows what he is doing or saying before he goes to work or says anything. If he does not, he displays folly.

Valuable knowledge is sometimes wasted by a lack of prudent action. If a person’s actions show that he has knowledge and understanding, he is prudent. It is demonstrated by the way he acts in the family, in society and in the church. We must deal with each one in a prudent manner. The Lord Jesus acted with perfect knowledge of things. Therefore, He always knew exactly what to say and not to say.

A Wicked Messenger or a Faithful Envoy

The contrast between the two lines of verse is “a wicked messenger” and “a faithful messenger” and “adversity” and “healing”. This is about the bringer of God’s message. A wicked messenger distorts God’s message, he brings false doctrine and gives false teaching. He causes confusion among the hearers and disrupts or sours relationships. The faithful messenger speaks of reconciliation with God and the neighbor. Paul and the apostles were trusted ambassadors for Christ (2Cor 5:20). Their message means healing of broken relationships, first with God and then with others.

When we think of contemporary messengers, we can mention journalists, for example. Many of them deliver the news every day. We can read it in newspapers and on the Internet. Their messages are mostly wicked and evil in content. They are messengers of the devil, because they want readers to believe that what God calls sin in His Word is not sin.

To Neglect Discipline or Regard Reproof

This verse is about how to respond to “discipline” and “reproof”. Those who consider it beneath their dignity to accept discipline and neglect it will live in poverty and shame. These are two kinds of evil that afflict such a person. Poverty affects the body; shame affects the spirit. He who willingly and humbly observes and accepts reproof for his wrong attributes and conduct, listens to it and acts accordingly, will be honored.

We need discipline and reproof because sin is still within us. He who observes reproof does so because he is aware of its necessity. To his surprise, he is honored for it, too, by God.

Sweet or an Abomination

It “is sweet to the soul” to desire something and then see that desire realized. The soul here is the seat of desires, the place where something is desired, considered and enjoyed beforehand. This is about the desires of a wise person.

“Fools” do not want such desires at all. The thought of desiring something good and its realization does not attract them at all. The thought of “turning away from evil” is “an abomination” to them. What to God is an abomination to behold is to fools their lust and life. Despite the sweetness of the realization of good desires, fools will not turn their back on evil, for their concern is to experience the realization of their wicked desires.

A realized desire regarding good, the ultimate satisfaction, is incompatible with doing evil. It is impossible to be happy while living in sin. Only fools live in sin. Realized desires belong to the righteous and the wise. Only they will desire what is truly satisfying, and that is fellowship with God.

To Walk With the Wise or With the Fools

This verse advises that we connect with the wise and not with the fools. Walking or be in company with the wise, will make us wise, for that is what we learn from them in our dealings with them. The second line of verse emphasizes the power of companionship. He who is a companion of fools “will suffer harm”, meaning he ends up as a fool. Examine who influences you, in what company you are. The effect shows it: “be wise” or “suffer harm”.

What you deal with, you get infected with, so the saying goes. From what we do and what we say, it is clear who we spend the most time with. “Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals”” (1Cor 15:33). To “walk with” means to be in the company of. The first thing the father warns his son about is bad company (Pro 1:10-11). This can be about people, but also about contacts through social media and consuming all kinds of movies and reading.

Who has not gained other friendships after conversion? There is no longer a common interest with worldly friends after conversion. It inevitably leads to distance. The new friends form the Christian character of wisdom. This must remain so, because the danger of falling back into old friendships is there when dealing with the Lord weakens. It is important to walk with Him as the Wisdom and also to walk with those who associate with Him and are therefore wise.

The advice is to walk with those of whom we know that God is with them (cf. Zec 8:23). The same goes for going to a church where people build each other up, where the members can all function according to their place in the body. The result then is that there will be spiritual growth toward independence. As a result, a person is later able to be a friend to others through whom they can become wise.

To Receive the Good or the Bad

In Pro 13:21, “adversity” is seen as a person who “pursues sinners”, with the thought that adversity will also overtake them. “The righteous will be rewarded with prosperity” from people because of his righteousness.

Adversity is misfortune, disaster. Some people also speak of ‘bad luck’ in such cases. This indicates the exclusion of Divine control over things, as if someone is struck by impersonal ‘fate’. The opposite then is being ‘lucky’.

This verse is sometimes true in life, but always true in eternity. In the hereafter, the imbalances that may be there on earth are corrected. The rich man had received good during his life and Lazarus received evil. That is reversed after death. Abraham points this out to the rich man (Lk 16:25).

When someone dies, the inheritance does not go to the grandchildren, but to the children. Yet grandparents can also leave an inheritance for grandchildren (Pro 13:22). What then can grandchildren inherit? Inheritance does not necessarily have to be about money or material possessions. Someone has said that the worst thing you can do for your children is to leave a lot of money for them. What “the good man” can leave for his grandchildren is his fear of God and his good example (Psa 103:17).

How do our grandchildren remember us? They can “inherit”, that is, adopt the righteous principles that have defined our behavior and begin to live by them themselves. All the prayers we have done for them are a great inheritance we leave behind.

Divine justice determines the final destination of the wealth a person leaves behind. The wealth does not come into the hands of sinners, but into the hands of the righteous. What the sinner contemplates as his wealth, will pass after his death into the hands of the righteous who knows how to properly handle it (cf. Psa 49:10). This will be fulfilled in its fullness in the kingdom of peace, when all the wicked have been judged (Isa 61:6).

When “fallow ground” is cultivated, that is, the land is plowed, it gives “abundant food” to the poor (Pro 13:23). The poor need not go hungry because the earth provides enough for everyone. That would be the situation if the rich were righteous. But because of sin, the practice is that due to injustice, what hard labor has produced is swept away. The poor are oppressed and exploited. There is no lack of food, but there is lack of justice (Jam 2:6; Jam 5:4).

He Who Loves His Son, Disciplines Him

Not disciplining a child is not only a lack of parenting, but also a lack of love. The rod is one of the means of parenting, not the only means. Eli withheld his sons his rod and God had to judge them (1Sam 2:27-34; 1Sam 3:11-14; 1Sam 4:11). Slack parenting does a child no good, but harm. It is not true love, but goes against the best interests of the child. ‘His’ rod is the rod of the father for ‘his’ son. ‘Diligence’ indicates commitment by the father. He does not proceed laxly, but with deliberation and purpose. There is also zeal in it.

Withholding the rod here is called hating the child. It is claimed that the use of the rod is not evidence of love for the child. But in fact, it is often self-love rather than love for the child. Parents do not discipline the child because they do not discipline themselves. They are guided by their natural feelings and indulgence, by the desire to be liked and wanting to be popular. But it is better to inflict short pain than to suffer a lifetime of pain caused by children to whom the rod has been withheld.

Nor should there be an excess of discipline. A punishment must be consistent with the disobedience that deserves punishment. The child will otherwise become despondent or bitter, and that because of our actions (Eph 6:4; Col 3:21). Parenting is about the balance between giving the child space to grow and indicating the boundaries of that space.

Corporal punishment is increasingly outlawed in modern Western society. The growth of child abuse cases has caused this shift in public opinion. Clearly, there is a difference between beating and abuse. It is at this point that public opinion wanders. As is always the case with public opinion, the pendulum has swung from one extreme to the other.

However, the Bible does not speak of child abuse, but commands that a spanking should be given because it is an effective means of teaching a young child. An Egyptian proverb says: Children have their ears on their behinds; they listen when they are spanked. God wants us in childhood to learn to associate physical pain inflicted on us by our parents with evil, to train us to make the right moral choices as we grow up.

To Satisfy the Appetite or to Be in Need

God promises that “the righteous” does not lack, but can eat “enough to satisfy his appetite”. He rewards the righteous person’s righteousness by the satisfaction of his physical needs. This is a general statement based on what God promises in the law to those who walk according to His commandments (Lev 26:5; Psa 37:25). This promise will be fulfilled in the kingdom of peace. It is not a guarantee that God will always supply all physical needs and the righteous will never go hungry or even feel hungry. Paul suffered hunger and want (Phil 4:12).

It does not mean that the righteous can always eat his fill. It does mean that the righteous can always be perfectly satisfied with the promises of God. The Lord Jesus spoke of “food which perishes” and of “food which endures to eternal life” (Jn 6:27). Here we see the difference. Our first concern should not be the food which perishes, but the spiritual food He gives in Himself as the manna. The Lord Jesus had food to eat that His disciples did not know. That food was doing His Father’s will (Jn 4:34). That gives full satisfaction.

“The stomach of the wicked”, which is so often fat and round now, will no longer be filled. For them, after death there is endless “need”. Instead of being satisfied, they will be endlessly tormented by lack of everything that made up their life on earth. In life, the stomach was their god (Phil 3:19). In eternal pain, the gnawing feeling of hunger, of unfulfilled desire, will torment them forever. Not even a drop of water will be given to them (Lk 16:24-25).