Controlling Parents
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In the context of biblical teachings, the role and behavior of parents are significant themes that are addressed throughout Scripture. The Bible provides guidance on the responsibilities of parents, emphasizing the importance of nurturing, instructing, and disciplining children in a manner that aligns with God's principles. However, the concept of "controlling parents" can be examined through the lens of biblical teachings on authority, love, and the balance of discipline and encouragement.

Biblical Authority and Parental Responsibility

The Bible establishes the family as a fundamental unit of society, with parents holding a position of authority over their children. This authority is not meant to be authoritarian or oppressive but is intended to reflect God's loving and just nature. Ephesians 6:4 instructs, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; instead, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." This verse highlights the balance parents must maintain between discipline and nurturing, ensuring that their authority does not lead to resentment or discouragement in their children.

Discipline and Instruction

Proverbs 22:6 states, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." This proverb underscores the importance of guiding children in a manner that prepares them for a life of faith and righteousness. While discipline is a necessary aspect of parenting, it should be administered with love and wisdom, avoiding harshness or excessive control that can stifle a child's growth and independence.

Love and Encouragement

The Bible emphasizes the importance of love in all relationships, including that between parents and children. Colossians 3:21 advises, "Fathers, do not embitter your children, so they will not become discouraged." This verse serves as a reminder that parental authority should be exercised with compassion and understanding, fostering an environment where children feel valued and supported.

The Example of God’s Fatherhood

God's relationship with His children serves as the ultimate model for parental behavior. Throughout Scripture, God is depicted as a loving and patient Father who guides, disciplines, and encourages His children. Hebrews 12:7-11 explains, "Endure suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? ... No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields a harvest of righteousness and peace to those who have been trained by it." This passage illustrates the purpose of discipline as a means of growth and righteousness, rather than control or punishment.

Avoiding Over-Control

While the Bible supports parental authority, it also warns against the dangers of over-control and the potential for negative consequences. The account of Eli and his sons in 1 Samuel 2:12-36 serves as a cautionary tale of the failure to exercise appropriate parental authority, resulting in the sons' moral decline and eventual downfall. Conversely, excessive control can lead to rebellion and estrangement, as children may feel suffocated and unable to develop their own identity and relationship with God.

Conclusion

In summary, the Bible provides a framework for understanding the role of parents as loving authorities who guide their children with wisdom and compassion. While maintaining authority is essential, it should be balanced with love, encouragement, and respect for the child's individuality. By following the example of God's fatherhood, parents can avoid the pitfalls of being overly controlling and instead foster an environment where their children can thrive spiritually and emotionally.
Topical Bible Verses
Isaiah 30:1-33
Woe to the rebellious children, said the LORD, that take counsel, but not of me; and that cover with a covering, but not of my spirit, that they may add sin to sin:
Topicalbible.org

Ephesians 6:4
And, you fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Topicalbible.org

Library

Family Habits.
... Profanity and falsehood and all other outrages against God will soon become the
controlling habits of their lives. But when taken early, parents have complete ...
/.../philips/the christian home/chapter xvii family habits.htm

Letter ii. Self-Control and Self-Culture.
... It is so easy to make a petulant or disrespectful reply to parents or teachers when
they reprove; so much ... It is the same in regard to controlling your temper. ...
/.../letter ii self-control and self-culture.htm

Luther's Separation from Rome.
... His parents having by thrift and industry acquired a competence, they were able ... the
philosophy and theology which had so long held a controlling influence upon ...
/.../7 luthers separation from rome.htm

Luther's Separation from Rome
... His parents having by thrift and industry acquired a competence, they were able ... the
philosophy and theology which had so long held a controlling influence upon ...
/.../white/the great controversy/chapter 7 luthers separation from.htm

Changed Conditions
... on a journey, for with such a slow traveller as your controlling genius the ... in school
rebelled at the decree which separated them from their parents at such a ...
/.../the fulfilment of a dream of pastor hsis/chapter xx changed conditions.htm

Letter xiii. Christian Activity.
... grow up without instruction, in ignorance and vice, because their parents are vicious ...
the formation of early habits, females exert a controlling influence over ...
/.../letter xiii christian activity.htm

The Sinner's Excuses Answered
... The evil that befalls him through his connection with his parents is always ... But the
ultimate purpose controlling all volition, and relating to the main object ...
/.../finney/sermons on gospel themes/vi the sinners excuses answered.htm

Letter cii. (AD 409. )
... notwithstanding the different mode of origination, the nature of the parents born
from ... when and where everything should be done in the controlling and ordering ...
/.../augustine/the confessions and letters of st/letter cii a d 409.htm

Election no Discouragement to Seeking Souls
... not of a supposed republic of all created existences, controlling and guiding ... Our
first parents have sinned, and we, their children, have attainted ourselves ...
/.../spurgeons sermons volume 10 1864/election no discouragement to seeking.htm

The Evolution of a Father
... In a second child, reared by parents one degree more loving than the last ... the area
will presently be extended, and the necessity of controlling self-interest ...
/.../the lowell lectures on the ascent of man/chapter ix the evolution of.htm

Resources
Counseling Related Questions (All) | GotQuestions.org

Is “name it claim it” teaching biblical? | GotQuestions.org

Family Relationships ' Article Index | GotQuestions.org

Controlling: Dictionary and Thesaurus | Clyx.com

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Subtopics

Controlling

Controlling Anger

Controlling Parents

Controlling Your Thoughts

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Controlling Anger
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