Judges 14:3

But his father and mother replied, "Can't you find a young woman among your relatives or among any of our people? Must you go to the uncircumcised Philistines to get a wife?" But Samson told his father, "Get her for me, for she is pleasing to my eyes."

Study Bible

But his father and mother replied
In this opening phrase, we see the involvement of Samson's parents in his life decisions. The Hebrew word for "father" is "אָב" (av), and "mother" is "אֵם" (em). This highlights the family structure and the respect for parental authority in ancient Israelite culture. The parents' reply indicates their concern and guidance, which is a recurring theme in biblical narratives, emphasizing the importance of honoring one's parents as commanded in the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:12).

Is there no woman among the daughters of your relatives
This phrase reflects the cultural and religious expectation for Israelites to marry within their own community. The Hebrew word for "daughters" is "בָּנוֹת" (banot), which signifies not just familial ties but also cultural and religious continuity. Marrying within one's tribe or people was seen as a way to preserve the covenant community and avoid the influence of foreign gods, as warned in Deuteronomy 7:3-4.

or among all our people
The phrase "all our people" underscores the collective identity of the Israelites. The Hebrew term "עַם" (am) for "people" conveys a sense of belonging and shared faith. This reflects the broader biblical narrative where Israel is called to be a distinct nation, set apart for God's purposes (Exodus 19:5-6). The parents' question implies a concern for maintaining this distinctiveness.

that you must go to the uncircumcised Philistines
The term "uncircumcised" is significant, as circumcision was the sign of the covenant between God and Abraham's descendants (Genesis 17:10-14). The Philistines, being uncircumcised, were outside this covenant community. This highlights the tension between Israel and the surrounding nations, where intermarriage could lead to idolatry and a departure from God's laws, as seen in the warnings throughout the Old Testament.

to get a wife?”
The act of "getting a wife" from the Philistines is not just a personal choice but a theological and communal issue. In the Hebrew context, marriage was not merely a private affair but a covenantal relationship with implications for the entire community. Samson's desire to marry a Philistine woman challenges the boundaries set by God for His people, reflecting the recurring theme of Israel's struggle with faithfulness to God's commands.

But Samson said to his father
Here, we see Samson's response, indicating his determination and perhaps a hint of defiance. The Hebrew name "שִׁמְשׁוֹן" (Shimshon) means "sun-like" or "little sun," suggesting strength and potential. However, his insistence on his own desires foreshadows the personal and national conflicts that arise from disregarding divine guidance.

Get her for me
Samson's demand is direct and assertive, showing his strong will. The Hebrew verb "קַח" (kach) means "to take" or "to get," indicating action and possession. This reflects a self-centered approach, contrasting with the biblical ideal of seeking God's will in all decisions, especially those as significant as marriage.

for she is pleasing to my eyes.”
The phrase "pleasing to my eyes" reveals Samson's focus on physical attraction rather than spiritual or covenantal considerations. The Hebrew word "יָשָׁר" (yashar) means "right" or "pleasing," often used to describe what is good in one's own sight. This echoes the recurring biblical warning against doing what is right in one's own eyes rather than following God's commandments (Judges 17:6, 21:25). It serves as a cautionary tale about the dangers of prioritizing personal desires over divine directives.

Persons / Places / Events

1. Samson
A judge of Israel known for his supernatural strength, given by God, and his Nazirite vow. His life is marked by personal weaknesses and impulsive decisions.

2. Samson's Parents
Manoah and his wife, who were devout Israelites. They were concerned about Samson's choice of a Philistine woman, reflecting their desire for him to adhere to Israelite customs and God's laws.

3. Philistines
A group of people who were enemies of Israel. They were uncircumcised, symbolizing their separation from the covenant community of Israel.

4. Timnah
A Philistine town where Samson saw the woman he desired to marry, indicating a place of cultural and spiritual conflict.

5. Marriage
The event in question, highlighting the tension between cultural practices and divine commandments.

Teaching Points

The Danger of Impulsivity
Samson's decision was based on physical attraction rather than spiritual discernment. Believers are encouraged to seek God's wisdom rather than relying solely on personal desires.

Cultural vs. Spiritual Values
Samson's choice highlights the tension between cultural practices and spiritual convictions. Christians are called to prioritize their faith over societal norms.

Parental Guidance and Wisdom
Samson's parents attempted to guide him according to God's laws. This underscores the importance of heeding godly counsel and the role of parents in spiritual formation.

Consequences of Disobedience
Samson's actions foreshadow the troubles that arise from disobedience to God's commands. Believers are reminded of the importance of obedience and the potential consequences of straying from God's path.

Bible Study Questions

1. How does Samson's choice of a Philistine woman reflect his spiritual state, and what can we learn from this about the importance of aligning our desires with God's will?

2. In what ways do cultural pressures today challenge our commitment to biblical principles, and how can we remain steadfast in our faith?

3. How can we discern when our desires are leading us away from God's plan, and what steps can we take to realign ourselves with His will?

4. What role should parental or spiritual guidance play in our decision-making processes, and how can we cultivate a heart that is receptive to such counsel?

5. Reflect on a time when you faced a decision that seemed right in your own eyes but conflicted with God's Word. What did you learn from that experience, and how can it inform your future choices?

Connections to Other Scriptures

Deuteronomy 7:3-4
This passage warns the Israelites against intermarrying with foreign nations to prevent turning away from God. Samson's desire for a Philistine woman directly contradicts this command.

1 Samuel 16:7
This verse emphasizes that God looks at the heart, not outward appearances, contrasting with Samson's focus on what is "pleasing to his eyes."

Proverbs 14:12
This proverb warns that there is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death, paralleling Samson's impulsive decision-making.