1 Samuel 20:41

When the young man had gone, David got up from the south side of the stone, fell facedown, and bowed three times. Then he and Jonathan kissed each other and wept together--though David wept more.

Study Bible

When the servant had gone
This phrase sets the stage for a deeply personal and emotional encounter between David and Jonathan. The departure of the servant signifies a moment of privacy, allowing for an intimate exchange. In the Hebrew context, servants often acted as intermediaries or witnesses, and their absence here underscores the confidentiality and intensity of the moment. This privacy is crucial for the vulnerability and sincerity that follows.

David got up from the south side of the stone
The "south side of the stone" refers to a specific location known as "Ezel," which means "departure" or "separation" in Hebrew. This stone serves as a geographical marker and a symbolic point of transition. David's rising from this place signifies a readiness to face the reality of his situation, moving from a place of hiding to one of confrontation and farewell.

fell facedown
This act of prostration is a profound gesture of humility and respect in ancient Near Eastern culture. It indicates David's acknowledgment of Jonathan's royal status and their deep bond. The Hebrew root for "fell" (נפל, naphal) often conveys a sense of submission and reverence, highlighting the gravity of the moment and the depth of David's emotions.

and bowed three times
Bowing three times is a significant act of honor and respect. In biblical numerology, the number three often represents completeness or perfection. This triple bowing could symbolize the completeness of David's respect and gratitude towards Jonathan, acknowledging the covenantal bond they share and the sacrifices Jonathan has made for him.

Then they kissed one another
In the ancient Near East, a kiss was a common expression of friendship, loyalty, and affection. This act between David and Jonathan transcends mere friendship; it is a testament to their covenantal relationship. The Hebrew word for kiss (נשק, nashaq) can also imply a sense of attachment or bonding, reflecting the deep emotional and spiritual connection between the two.

and wept together
The mutual weeping signifies the emotional intensity of their parting. In Hebrew culture, weeping is often associated with mourning and deep sorrow. This shared grief underscores the pain of separation and the uncertainty of their future. It is a poignant reminder of the cost of loyalty and the sacrifices inherent in their friendship.

though David wept more
This detail highlights David's profound sense of loss and vulnerability. As the anointed future king, David faces immense pressure and danger, and Jonathan's support has been a source of strength. The fact that David weeps more suggests his awareness of the impending challenges and the depth of his reliance on Jonathan's friendship. It is a moment of raw humanity, revealing the emotional burden of his calling and the cost of his journey.

Persons / Places / Events

1. David
The future king of Israel, anointed by Samuel, and a man after God's own heart. At this point, he is fleeing from King Saul, who seeks his life.

2. Jonathan
The son of King Saul and a close friend of David. He is known for his loyalty and covenant friendship with David, even at the cost of his own future as king.

3. The Stone Ezel
A landmark where David and Jonathan meet. It serves as a secret meeting place for their farewell, symbolizing a point of separation and covenant.

4. The Servant
A young boy who assists Jonathan in the ruse to communicate with David. His presence is part of the plan to ensure David's safety.

5. The Weeping
A significant emotional event where both David and Jonathan express their deep sorrow and affection, highlighting the depth of their friendship and the pain of their separation.

Teaching Points

The Value of Covenant Friendships
True friendships are marked by loyalty, sacrifice, and mutual support. Jonathan and David's relationship exemplifies a covenant friendship that is willing to endure hardship and separation.

Emotional Expression in Godly Relationships
The Bible does not shy away from showing deep emotions. David and Jonathan's weeping is a reminder that expressing emotions is a healthy and godly response to life's challenges.

The Cost of Loyalty
Jonathan's loyalty to David, despite his father Saul's opposition, teaches us about the cost of standing by our commitments and the importance of prioritizing God's will over personal gain.

Trusting God in Times of Separation
David and Jonathan's farewell reminds us to trust God during times of separation and uncertainty, knowing that He is sovereign over our relationships and futures.

Bible Study Questions

1. How does the friendship between David and Jonathan challenge our understanding of loyalty and sacrifice in our own relationships?

2. In what ways can we cultivate covenant friendships that reflect the biblical model seen in David and Jonathan's relationship?

3. How can we apply the emotional honesty seen in 1 Samuel 20:41 to our own relationships, especially in times of difficulty or separation?

4. What are some modern-day examples of relationships where loyalty to God’s will might come at a personal cost, similar to Jonathan’s situation?

5. How can the account of David and Jonathan encourage us to trust God during times of separation from loved ones, and what other biblical examples support this trust?

Connections to Other Scriptures

Genesis 33:3-4
The reunion of Jacob and Esau, where they embrace and weep, showing reconciliation and deep emotion.

Acts 20:37
Paul’s farewell to the Ephesian elders, where they weep and embrace, demonstrating the bonds of Christian fellowship and love.

Proverbs 18:24
The verse speaks of a friend who sticks closer than a brother, reflecting the deep bond between David and Jonathan.