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1. For the duly — "Submit yourselves." Subjection in the general on God's part noteth the subordination of one creature to another according to His wise disposal, as the imperfect to the more perfect, and this for the good of both; for it is so ordered, that in all relations comfort and duty shall go together. On our part it is a ready inclination to obey this order set by God; for every creature must know his place, and be content with the order wherein God hath set him. According to this order, submission is required of the wife towards her husband; though she is not to be subject as children to their parents, much less as servants to their masters.

2. The persons — "To your own husbands."

3. The manner how it is to be done — "As unto the Lord," i.e., Christ.

(1) The regulation of the duty; it must be clone willingly and sincerely, resembling that submission which is performed to Christ, whose image, in His government over the Church, the husband beareth in his superiority over the wife.

(2) It may import the enforcement, the reason and motive of this duty, because Christ hath commanded it; and by virtue of the law of Christ all wives must be subject to their husbands; which doth not disannul, but confirm God's institution, for His precepts are not privative, but accumulative.

(3) "As unto the Lord" implieth a limitation; this subjection must be in all things which belong to the lawful authority and superiority of the husband; or so it seemeth to be expressed: "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord" (Colossians 3:18).

(4) It importeth Christ's acceptance of this duty. He interpreteth this subjection and obedience as given to Himself, and the contrary as rebellion against Himself; for it is service done to Christ: which may give the woman comfort against all unkindnesses, and unthankful returns from her husband. That wives must reckon it their unquestionable duty to be subject to their husbands.Let me show you —

(1)  Wherein this subjection consisteth.

(2)  The reasons and grounds of it.

I. Wherein it consisteth. To speak briefly of it, this subjection lieth in two things — in reverence and obedience.

1. In reverence, which is both inward and outward.

(1) The inward, in a due esteem of the husband, which is the ground of all love and submission. So it is said, "Let the woman reverence her husband" (Ephesians 5:33). If for nothing else, yet in a humble acknowledgment of his right by God's ordinance; for esteem is not only due to personal qualifications, but to the eminent dignity wherein God hath placed any creature with whom we have commerce; and if we cannot acknowledge them for any worth in them, yet we must acknowledge God in them, who hath put His image of superiority upon them, that we may the better discharge our duties to them.

(2) Outward reverence is both in word and deed.

2. Obedience: that is showed in many things.

(1) in studying to please rather than to be pleased; for the apostle telleth us that "she that is married eateth for the things of this world, that she may please her husband" (1 Corinthians 7:34).

(2) By fulfilling his commands in all things lawful, and not contrary to her duty to God (Titus 2:5).

(3) By submitting her will to her husband's content, and her desires to his approbation and allowance (Genesis 3:16).

(4) In patience under his rebukes. So the apostle (1 Timothy 2:12). Meekness and quietness is chiefly exercised in bridling our passions, when anything falleth out cross and contrary to our desires and expectations, and we eschew all needless contradiction and expressions of malcontentedness. Now this is not only gaining upon the husband, but is very acceptable to God, who delighteth in the graces He hath wrought in His own people. But now, on the contrary, a humorous moroseness and impatiency is very displeasing unto God and man, and destructive of family society (Proverbs 13:19).

(5) By being a comfort and a help to him (Genesis 2:18). The woman is to be a help, not a hindrance; not the governor, for the right is originally in the man, but a help in government, to ease him in part of his burden and cares; a help every way, for the comfort of society, for assistance in governing the family.

II. The grounds and reasons.

1. The law of nature written by God's own finger in the hearts of men. We read of those who were heathens, that they enacted a law and decree: "That every man should bear rule in his own house; and that all the women should give honour to the husband, both great and small" (Esther 1:20, 22). Indeed, both anciently and to this very day, great is the power of the husbands over their wives in Persia. Now, shall heathens see that which Christians do not?

2. God's ordination, which a holy heart dareth not disobey. Now, God hath expressly commanded it in His word in the text (so Colossians 3:18).

3. The natural imperfection of the woman. The apostle calleth her "the weaker vessel" (1 Peter 3:7). Abilities of mind are not ordinarily so strong in her as in the man; and they have fewer opportunities than man hath for perfecting their natural parts; and they are not so able to provide for themselves, modesty not permitting them to go up and down in the world.

4. The manner and order of the creation. The woman was made after man, out of man, and for man. God formed man first, and then the woman out of him, and for man's good (see 1 Timothy 2:13; 1 Corinthians 11:8, 9).

5. From the woman's being first in the transgression; for this is a part of the sentence: "He shall bear rule over thee" (Genesis 3:16).

6. The inconveniences that would ensue if this subjection were taken away. There must be order in every society, without which there followeth division, and thereupon confusion; and a house divided cannot stand.

Use 1. Is reproof to several sorts.

1. Of all those frothy and profane wits who scoff at women's subjection, and make it a matter of unsavoury mirth. See how misbecoming Christians this is, partly as it is a duty required by God.

2. It reproveth those that dispute against it by manifold cavils; but no reasoning must be allowed against a plain and known duty. Therefore, to prevent these disputes, let me lay down two conclusions —

(1) On the wife's part; no privilege of birth, parts, breeding, can exempt her from it.

(2) On the husband's part; no personal infirmity, no froward nature, no error in religion (1 Corinthians 7:13), deprives him of it.

3. It reproveth them that have no reason to allege but their own imperious and peevish humour causeth them to live discontentedly and disobediently in this relation.

4. It reproveth those husbands that by their own default lose their authority and dignity, and are themselves causes that their own power is lessened and diminished, either by their intemperance, behaving themselves as beasts rather than men, that they are altogether unfit to judge what is meet and good for the family. It is true the husband is to govern, not by fear, but by love. He is the image of Christ in governing His Church, and the wife is not a slave, but a meet help; but this love should not be a snare to him. And it is true the wife should not be despised, for God saith to Abraham, "Hearken to the voice of Sarah." But there is a difference between hearkening to good counsel, and swallowing a temptation, and being driven to evil by the woman's imperiousness.

Use 2. Is to exhort wives to submit to their own husbands.

1. The impediments.

(1)  Pride.

(2)  A defect of true love.

(3)  Affectation of vanity.

(4)  Want of self-denial.

2. Motives.

(1) It is easier and safer to obey than to prescribe and direct, and more felicity is found in obedience than in commands; and in the event it is found more safe; as Zipporah, by obeying her husband in circumcising the child, saved his life (Exodus 4:26).

(2) It is better to give the husband occasion of thanksgiving than of complaining (James 5:9).

(3) Your own peace, that your "prayers may not be interrupted" (1 Peter 3:7).

(4) Honour to God.

(a) It takes away the reproach of the gospel: "Obedient to their own husbands, that the Word of God be not blasphemed" (Titus 2:5). That Christian religion may not be thought to impose anything contrary to moral virtues.

(b) That gainsayers may be won to God: "Ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, that if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives" (1 Peter 3:1).

(T. Manton, D. D.)

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KJV: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

WEB: Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.