Ephesians 6:4

Fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath; instead, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Study Bible

Fathers
The Greek word used here is "πατέρες" (pateres), which can be translated as "fathers" but can also encompass parents in general. In the cultural context of the time, fathers were seen as the primary authority figures in the household. This word emphasizes the responsibility placed on fathers to lead their families in a godly manner. The patriarchal structure of ancient society meant that fathers had significant influence over their children's spiritual and moral upbringing.

do not provoke
The Greek term "παροργίζετε" (parorgizete) means to exasperate or incite to anger. This phrase warns against harsh or unfair treatment that could lead to resentment. In a historical context, Roman law gave fathers absolute authority over their children, sometimes leading to severe discipline. Paul’s instruction here is counter-cultural, urging fathers to exercise their authority with love and patience, reflecting the character of God.

your children
The Greek word "τέκνα" (tekna) refers to offspring or children. This term is inclusive, indicating that the instruction applies to all children under the care of the father. In the biblical context, children were considered a blessing from God, and their upbringing was a sacred duty. The focus here is on nurturing and guiding children in a way that honors God.

to wrath
The word "ὀργή" (orge) signifies anger or wrath. The warning is against actions that would lead children to harbor anger or bitterness. This reflects a broader biblical principle of avoiding actions that cause others to stumble or sin. The emphasis is on fostering a home environment where love and understanding prevail, rather than conflict and resentment.

instead
This word serves as a transition, indicating a contrast between two approaches to parenting. It highlights the shift from negative actions to positive, godly practices. The use of "instead" underscores the importance of intentionality in parenting, choosing to follow God's ways over worldly methods.

bring them up
The Greek "ἐκτρέφετε" (ektrephete) means to nourish or rear. This phrase suggests a process of nurturing and caring for children, much like tending to a garden. It implies a long-term commitment to the child's growth and development, both physically and spiritually. The historical context of this term would resonate with an agrarian society familiar with the patience and care required in cultivation.

in the discipline
The word "παιδεία" (paideia) refers to training or education, often with a focus on moral and spiritual development. This concept was central to Greek and Roman thought, emphasizing the formation of character and virtue. In a biblical sense, discipline is not merely punitive but is aimed at guiding children towards righteousness and wisdom.

and instruction
The Greek "νουθεσία" (nouthesia) means admonition or counsel. This involves teaching and guiding children through words and example. The scriptural context emphasizes the importance of imparting God's truth and wisdom, ensuring that children understand and embrace the teachings of the faith.

of the Lord
This phrase centers the entire verse on Christ. The Greek "Κυρίου" (Kyriou) refers to the Lord, indicating that the ultimate goal of parenting is to lead children into a relationship with Jesus. This reflects the conservative Christian perspective that all aspects of life, including parenting, should be grounded in a commitment to follow Christ and His teachings. The historical and scriptural context underscores the transformative power of living under the lordship of Christ, shaping not only individual lives but entire families and communities.

Persons / Places / Events

1. Paul the Apostle
The author of the letter to the Ephesians, providing guidance to the early Christian church.

2. Ephesus
A major city in Asia Minor where the Ephesian church was located, known for its diverse culture and religious practices.

3. Fathers
Specifically addressed in this verse, representing parental authority and responsibility in a Christian household.

4. Children
The recipients of parental guidance and discipline, central to the family structure.

5. The Lord
Refers to Jesus Christ, whose teachings and example are the foundation for Christian living and instruction.

Teaching Points

Parental Responsibility
Fathers are called to lead their children with love and patience, avoiding actions that lead to anger or resentment.

Balanced Discipline
Discipline should be administered in a way that reflects God's love and justice, aiming to guide rather than punish.

Spiritual Instruction
Parents are tasked with teaching their children about the Lord, integrating biblical principles into daily life.

Role Modeling
Parents should exemplify Christian virtues, serving as role models for their children in faith and conduct.

Encouragement and Support
Building a nurturing environment where children feel valued and supported in their spiritual growth.

Bible Study Questions

1. How can fathers (or parents) avoid provoking their children to wrath in today's context?

2. In what ways can parents incorporate the "discipline and instruction of the Lord" into their daily family routines?

3. How does the concept of discipline in Ephesians 6:4 compare to the discipline described in Hebrews 12:7-11?

4. What are some practical steps parents can take to ensure they are role models of Christian virtues for their children?

5. How can the church community support parents in fulfilling the responsibilities outlined in Ephesians 6:4?

Connections to Other Scriptures

Colossians 3:21
This verse similarly advises fathers not to embitter their children, highlighting the importance of nurturing rather than provoking.

Proverbs 22:6
Emphasizes the importance of training a child in the way they should go, aligning with the instruction aspect of Ephesians 6:4.

Deuteronomy 6:6-7
Encourages parents to diligently teach God's commandments to their children, reinforcing the idea of spiritual instruction.

Hebrews 12:7-11
Discusses the concept of discipline as a form of love and guidance, which is relevant to the discipline mentioned in Ephesians 6:4.

Psalm 127:3-5
Describes children as a heritage from the Lord, underscoring the value and responsibility of raising them in a godly manner.