My soul is weary of my life; I will leave my complaint on myself; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul.
We need not wonder that Job was weary of his life. Beggared, bereft of his family, smitten with a painful and loathsome disease, tormented by the cruel comfort of his friends, he could see nothing but misery around and before him. Few, if any, have been in his sore plight. Yet others have felt the same weariness of life that the patriarch so naturally experienced. Let us look at the sorrowful condition and its Divine remedy.
I. THE SORROWFUL CONDITION.
1. The misery of it. Life is naturally sweet. It is a most merciful arrangement of Providence that the hard lot which would seem to be unbearable when regarded from the outside has many alleviations and consolations for those to whose portion it has fallen. There are few lives on which no gleam of sunshine ever falls. But to be weary of life is to have lost all the sunshine, and to be in dark despair. Like "Mariana of the moated grange," the desolate one cries -
I am aweary, aweary;
O God that I were dead!"
2. The dangers of it.
(1) It tempts to suicide, and that is sin.
(2) It leads to the neglect of duty; for if a man has no hope or heart in life, it is difficult for him to take up its tasks. When life itself is no longer worth living, it is hard to summon any energy for work.
(3) It blinds us to remedies. Like Hagar in her despair, we do not lift up our eyes to see the fountain. Despair justifies itself by blinding us to hope.
3. The causes of it. This weariness of life may spring item a terrible conjunction of external circumstances, as it did in part with Job. But internal causes usually co-operate. Sometimes the despair is a result of bodily or brain disease, and the sufferer must be pitied and treated accordingly. But it may come from brooding too much over the dark side of life, from distrust of God, from a consciousness of sin, or from impenitent and rebellious thoughts. Ennui is the product of indolence. Weariness of life is often a result of idle sentimentality.
II. THE DIVINE REMEDY. This evil is not incurable. For the despair is a delusion. No one would be weary of life if he knew all its future possibilities. If the despair is a result of brain disorder, the remedy is in medicine, not theology. Here is a harder-land where the two faculties touch; therefore a man who practises either should not be a stranger to the other. Despair may give way to a change of scene and a bracing regimen without any arguments. But when the causes are deeper and more spiritual, a corresponding remedy must be looked for. This will not be found in any worldly philosophy of life. The wonder is not that some people are weary of life, but that all who are "without God in the world" are not also "without hope." Pessimism is the natural goal of the Epicurean. Life is not worth living without God. The great remedy for weariness of life is the discovery of the true worth of life when it is redeemed by Christ and consecrated to God. Then it is not dependent on pleasure for its motives, nor driven to despair by pain. It has a higher blessedness than any earthly possession can give, in doing God's will on earth with the prospect of enjoying him for ever in hen yen. But even the unselfish service of our brother man will help to conquer weariness of life. If Mariana had been well occupied she might have overcome her misery. There is a healing grace in the discharge of duty, and more of it in losing ourselves while serving others. - W.F.A.
Parallel VersesKJV: My soul is weary of my life; I will leave my complaint upon myself; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul.