C.S. Lewis’s “First Things” Letter (1952)

On November 8, 1952, the English apologist and author C. S. Lewis, writing from Oxford in a private letter, addressed a fear as old as discipleship itself: that wholehearted devotion to God will thin our human affections. Lewis replied with a paradox of grace: “When I have learnt to love God better than my earthly dearest, I shall love my earthly dearest better than I do now…. When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.”

Lewis, known for joining clear reason with plain spiritual counsel, spoke to ordinary believers facing ordinary pressures—family claims, friendship loyalties, vocational duty, and the quiet worry that surrender to God will make life smaller. He insisted the opposite: the heart grows when it is rightly ordered.

Rightly Ordered Love

Lewis’s “first things” is not an attack on creation but a defense of it. Love becomes distorted when a good gift is made an ultimate god. Scripture sets the pattern: “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33). First does not mean only; it means foundational.

This ordering requires courage. It is a kind of heroism to obey God when affection pulls another way—to speak truth gently when silence would keep peace, to forgive when pride wants repayment, to serve when weariness argues for self-protection. Jesus’ own command holds the loves together without confusing them: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’… ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” (Matthew 22:37